Why is drinking Ribena deadly?

Because it has a lot of currant (current).

What kind of microorganism is homosexual?

Algae(gay)!

It's illegal for you to go to the toilet..

No.. really....
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Coz you'd need a PEE License for that!

Why do most people hate plants?

Because they are really root (rude)...

Plumbers (said with a silent B!)

Do not underestimate plumbers. They do more than just fixing broken pipes, sinks, etc. etc. etc. Did you know they are in the performing arts too? They specialize in TAP DANCING.

"What a heart-WRENCHING performance..." =P

Bob the Builder, can we fix it?

Bob the Builder, no you can't. You're a builder, not a fixer. Sorry Bob.

What do you call the action of wearing trousers?

PANTING.

What do say to a bucket with anaemia?

You look PAIL (PALE).

If a janitor was exposed to radiation...

If a janitor was exposed to radiation, mutated some super powers and became a super hero, what would his catch phrase be?

"IT'S TIME TO CLEAN UP YOUR ACT!"

Before you jump into any conclusions...

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Do your warm up first..

Students that anyone would dread teaching. (EVER!)

Professor: Genes are passed down from parent to offspring as a unit of inheritance...

Student: But sir, I won't be able to fit into my mother's jeans!

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Professor: There are millions of genes in a single person...

Student: But sir, Gene Hackman only has one gene!

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Professor: We have to love and appreciate genes for their uniqueness and...

MICHAEL: BILLIE GENE IS NOT MY LOVER...
(In memory of the great Michael Jackson)